READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
