Non-Jews are for practice
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
