Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
