Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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