The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize