K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Randomize
