I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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