he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
you would pick up someone in the library
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
