would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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