ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Don't EVER smell your tampon
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize