Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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