After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
