dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
