They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
