Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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