yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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