with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
