Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
