there's paper in my vomit.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
