he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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