you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize