I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
