My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize