I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
