Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
