I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
