hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
