This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
