just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize