Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
how does that bad decision feel?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
