why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
