We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
i out mim tonsoeep
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
