Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize