in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
its liver damage thursday
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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