Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
