it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
