There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize