I must be too annoying 4 u.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
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