Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
