Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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