If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
