Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
