That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
