he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
