Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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