I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I have fence marks all over my body
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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