Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
