i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
