Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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