She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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