My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
