Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Randomize