weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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