I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
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